The Gifts Come Forth
Dec. 14th, 2006 09:21 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
hafoc
You see them all year in tourist traps. Gifts, labeled and sold as such. You know the kind. Toothpick holders shaped like Mount Rushmore. Ceramic clowns with SOUVENIR OF FARGO NORTH DAKOTA painted on their tummies. Wooden moose that poop M&Ms. That kind of stuff.
But this time of year, they creep from such low-budget dens of commercialism to invade the countryside at large. And they're joined by bretheren seen only this time of year. Turnip-carving sets. Heavy duty electric rotary nose-hair trimmers. Appliances the size of a small suitcase that can ONLY grill hot dogs. Well, perhaps sausages too. And they warm the buns on top.
I sort of wish that people would come to realize that if they wouldn't allow the godsforsaken thing in their own house, odds are Aunt Marge won't be thrilled by it either. Unless she's a Bogan who collects black velvet Elvis paintings or something. Or perhaps singing fish. (I read a good story about singing fish once, but darned if I can find it now.)
But anyway-- to get back to the subject at hand-- if all America ever did have such an attack of "common" sense, it would probably tank our whole economy faster than $100 crude. So let us join Erasmus in the praise of folly!
But this time of year, they creep from such low-budget dens of commercialism to invade the countryside at large. And they're joined by bretheren seen only this time of year. Turnip-carving sets. Heavy duty electric rotary nose-hair trimmers. Appliances the size of a small suitcase that can ONLY grill hot dogs. Well, perhaps sausages too. And they warm the buns on top.
I sort of wish that people would come to realize that if they wouldn't allow the godsforsaken thing in their own house, odds are Aunt Marge won't be thrilled by it either. Unless she's a Bogan who collects black velvet Elvis paintings or something. Or perhaps singing fish. (I read a good story about singing fish once, but darned if I can find it now.)
But anyway-- to get back to the subject at hand-- if all America ever did have such an attack of "common" sense, it would probably tank our whole economy faster than $100 crude. So let us join Erasmus in the praise of folly!
